These new journal entires of mine are going to be...well...different, to say the least. No, I won't be talking about pointless details of my life. I won't be posting random surveys. And I definitely won't be whining about my problems on the Internet. Who even gets sympathy on the Internet?
No one.
If they do get any, it's cheap. That's all it is, is cheap sympathy.
What I will tell you about, though, is myself.
I'm like a bumblebee. I only sting you when you threaten me. Before, I was more like a turtle. I would have no problem walking around with my head out, but as soon as something bothered me, I hid myself away from the world. I was shy. I was fragile. I was easily manipulated.
But things change, don't they? People grow, they have experiences in their life that make them into the person they are today, right? Of course. I've had experiences that have changed me, blossomed me.
These days, I don't really know what I could say about me. I can be a total sweetheart, yet at the same time, I can be a jerk. I tend to listen rather than talk, but if something's on my mind, you'll need to bury me to get me to shut up. I'm generally quiet, but if I'm in the right mood and around the right people, I can be a powerhouse. I have the lungs of a saxophone player, a singer, and a drama kid. I could talk your ear off for hours, if the topic leads to something I enjoy.
I guess you could say I'm ironic, in some cases. For instance, I enjoy reading the Twilight series, but I do have fun bashing the books as well. Odd? Yes. But that's just me. I'm odd.
Like every human being, I have faults. I have weaknesses. Physically and emotionally. For one, I can't trust people. You have to be very, very close to me to earn my trust. Second of all, I'm a klutz. That's all I can say. I can't stand on my own two feet, which is why I'll never get hired for the circus. It's too bad. That was my dream job.
I can just picture myself. Up on that tightrope, with my umbrella in hand. The crowd waiting with baited breath as I lightly place my foot onto the long cord that seems to stretch on for miles. Everything's looking good so far. I hold my breath and inch my other foot onto the cord. A little wobbly, but I'll make it. Let's take the first step. One...
Splat.
Oops. I guess I fell, didn't I? Thank goodness for that net.
Like I said, odd. I don't want to be involved in the circus. I hate the circus. The labor the animals have to go through. The clowns. Shudder.
Yes, I am a supporter of animal rights, and yes, I do have an abnormal fear of clowns.
I love animals and I hate PETA. I hate clowns...and I hate clowns. That's it. Once you have a giant plywood cut-out of a clown fall on you when you're only 4 years old, it kind of causes some problems.
Also, like every human being, I get writer's block. Just like I am now. But this time, I don't want to try and unblock the writer's block. Because I'm finished with my tale.
I guess all I really have to say is...
Don't trip on the threshold on your way into the mess that is my life.